Alexx's Journal

Queerness and Conservatives

2026-04-06T03:13:47Z

"Why won't they just leave queer people alone? *We* aren't hurting *them*!"

I am so sick of hearing this. It's simply not true. You are not doing harm according to *your* value system, but according to *theirs*, you are a very real, *existential* threat. How many queer people do you know who have become estranged from conservative parents? The more that that happens, the more conservative society *shrinks*, and they are very aware of it.

For the patriarchy to survive, it must replicate itself in each new generation. Every out queer person is a threat to that process. Even if you aren't from a conservative family yourself, your *example* may cause members of conservative families to rebel. The conservatives are involved in a war for their very survival – and therefore, so are the rest of us. We must take it as seriously as they do, if we want to win.

It behooves us to understand the enemy. There are a number of things the conservatives want, and which influence their tactics. I will discuss these in roughly descending priority. [Please understand that I am using the words "queer" and "conservative" as useful shortcuts throughout. The exact identities vary over time.]

1) No queer people exist. Everyone is maximally gender-conforming at all times. This is, of course, impossible. I think many conservatives even understand that it is impossible. Still, this is their ultimate good, which all lesser goals seek to approximate.

2) The idea of queerness is eradicated. Sure, some people may feel odd urges, but without any framework of understanding, they can never act on those urges. Again, this is ultimately impossible, but *approximating* it is why so much energy goes into book banning and control of education. Within living memory, Britain's Section 28 was explicitly working toward this goal.

3) Queerness is a capital crime. The full force of the government will be brought to bear on any out queers. Sadly, this is not only achievable, but is currently the case in some parts of the world.

4) Queerness is a non-capital crime. Easier to achieve than the above. Currently being implemented against trans people in the US and UK.

5) Queerness is cause for universal social shunning. In some ways this is harder to achieve than making it a crime, but in other ways easier. It's the "universal" that is the sticky bit. There are large sections of the US which have managed this to at least some degree.

6) Queer *joy* is eradicated. It's alright for *some* folks to accept queerness in their midst, but only if the queer people are miserable or come to tragic ends at a young age. I think this is at the root of the still-all-too-pervasive "bury your gays" trope. This was all but explicit under the Hays Code, as administered by Joseph Breen.

With all this in mind, I think it's worth laying out what "success" looks like to conservatives overall, given that total eradication of queerness cannot be achieved. When a queer person stays miserably closeted for life, but acquires a spouse and children, whom they raise in the same kind of conservatism that they were born into – *that* is what success looks like. The misery is irrelevant, so long as the *reason* for it remains hidden. When a queer person finds the misery too much, and commits suicide, that is regrettable, but still *preferable* to having them challenge social norms directly.

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Sir Gawain Fucks the Green Knight

2026-03-08T19:53:25Z

Ran across this on Bluesky, and thought many of you would appreciate it:

Kym Deyn‬
‪kymdeyn‬
This is a sheer indulgence on my part, but it turns out I never actually shared the poem here, so:

Sir Gawain Fucks the Green Knight

Here’s a tale ripe for telling. Can’t say where I heard it first—in pretty French or Dutch. Perhaps as a young lady walking ‘longside the Rijn. I’ll spin it for you in an English tongue, fine as frost on lace, sweet as malmsey wine. So it goes that young Gawain, strength kissed into his limbs, fresh as the bright dawn, comes trembling down to the Green Chapel. You’ve heard this tale, I know. His breath makes peach fuzz in the air, fear into him like worm to apple. Christmas Morn is too soon, time is short. You have your own life to save, he says, picking through thorn and bough to an ivy-clad cave.
The creature is the Jack O’ the Glen / forest prince / the wood’s own laughter. Beard of lichen and eyes like dark elder. I need not repeat their exchange—my boy’s flinching heart—a songbird in a rattled cage. It is after the blows are dealt, he asks, what god is worshipped in these green trees? Boy, the Knight replies, boy, were you not just down on your knees?
The Knight is the tang of sap / bark rough and petal soft / everywhere leaves scatter / easily crushed / Gawain clings / hardly knows what he clings to / he is the forest and the flower / a turmoil of roots / where god and tree meet and melt / the birch the oak the fern the deer / mushroom maggot crow / here Gawain is branch and bud / blow returned for blow

https://bsky.app/profile/kymdeyn.bsky.social/post/3mgdgomties26

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Kaos

2025-02-10T01:56:35Z

Kestrell and I recently watched the Netflix series Kaos, and I highly recommend it. It was canceled after a single 8-episode season, sadly. While I would happily have watched several more seasons of it, the first season reaches sufficient closure that I didn't feel left in the lurch.( Read more... )

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alexxkay @ 2025-02-04T23:40:00

2025-02-04T23:41:23Z

Today is the one year anniversary of The ER Trip That Led to A Year In Hell. So the universe, to commemorate, has given Kestrell and I Covid.

Due to her medical situation, she can't have Paxlovid, but I picked up mine and have had the first dose. I see why everyone mentions That Taste.

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Summoning the voices in your head

2024-11-03T03:01:57Z

https://www.theguardian.com/news/2024/oct/29/acute-psychosis-inner-voices-avatar-therapy-psychiatry

This is fascinating. A new psychosis treatment that involves creating a computerized avatar of the "voices in your head", which the therapist then roleplays. Apparently astonishingly effective.

I'd call it sorcery. It's a novel formulation of "Only summon that which you can put down"; This is summoning an already-present demon *further* into reality, explicitly so that it can then be banished.

There is definitely some black magic mixed in with it of course, because this is being developed in a capitalist society. The procedure is described as "cost-effective" before they discuss its health effectiveness. Similarly, the article's author was not allowed to view some materials because they were "core IP".

Still, if the basic effect turns out to not be snake oil, this could be a huge benefit to humanity.

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Using Storytelling Powers For Evil

2024-08-18T05:39:38Z

Reading transcripts of the allegations against Neil Gaiman, there was one thing that really hit me viscerally. Well, one *pattern*, in his case. It's a technique he (allegedly) uses on many women, which I independently discovered in my 20s. I call this technique Using Storytelling Powers For Evil.

Once upon a time, it occurred to me to wonder if I could focus my storytelling powers on one specific audience member, as a way of getting laid. Performing the experiment, this proved to 100% be doable. This remains my single memory that I am most guilty about. I did it that once, and never again. The sex was good, but not remotely worth the guilt.

Having done this myself, I understand the absolute rush of power, the insidious temptation to *use* that power. There but for the grace of god, go I, etc, etc. But this understanding does not create sympathy. It makes me *angry*.

I did it once, and Gaiman seems to have done it for almost forty years It wasn't some complex moral calculus for me; I came to realize I had Done Wrong pretty quickly. Gaiman seems to be at least as morally aware as I am. He has to have *known* he was doing Evil, and consciously decided to continue doing so. Argh.

This is in part a confessional. But I also feel this is a perspective that I don't think many of Gaiman's (former) fans share. Thanks for listening.

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OCR-mancy

2024-07-13T00:28:54Z

Kestrell asked me to OCR an academic article for her, from a pretty poor quality scan. It required major corrections, including typing whole sections from scratch. But in between the correct results and the utter nonsense... was often weirdly oracular-sounding snippets. The text transmogrified, commenting on itself in new ways. It's kind of like the Burroughs/Gysin cut-up technique. I've included some selections below. (Bonus points if you can identify the subject of the original essay.)

... of the things lie item … In prism M 'Sum S (of course). I exit … Ills body …"ghostly Iran,’ lilt … (q I Palms 1973.23).
… upon bearing his musk … poke box crushed in record pres while retreating from a wearily guard … After concealing hit new … behind a helmet mink … both of which lie Audi ... costume for quail-’Gothic' performance… ironic sake for Window … idling Leah …
… aa wed as sardonically fanciful … Tint vast nirhtar of dwirrin here … the doing adolescent, … Ills •puce-age Gothic costume … becomes moss visibly … without any hitman presence. It Anally cornea to rest ui ... the ringing voice ...
…dr Maui target wafer … entertain tent … who limin' the products most craved l»y (irons … As nutter of fun, (lint wine of … reality of (lie … reining number of [record company) … mid to lute '70 … a corporate monopoly oil forms of luminu, … a taco-Baroque … Ms Opera (dr WITH 1974)- In the end. loathe resulting silence goes … hit company …
… in this Aim. so much to thai the redaction of al Me to image Instead of substance becomes a bade ingredient … Underlying Swan's obsessive dines 10 …’he gave up waging* to be come … (de Palms 197). 74 and Prolopic). …
…(dr 1‘Jnni 1974) The costumed Window … keep arm—dating … the tape now being mode … every apace within … (which Window finally arts afire) …
…Leroux's neo-Gothic tense … de Maw's … staged aeries of sacrifice … many mnero haw (aped everything cite (dc MOM 1974)
The moM desired solution … withal of rebellious adolescent creation … in a nay … is to br sotted in… by the very mews and nnn … moat grotesque characters and unapt … (which he trim to burn up) … cite ironies …
… a brood social portrait … at the time of chin Aim…

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First gay antiques dealer?

2023-12-18T20:59:21Z

This trope came up in conversation recently. It goes back at least to Agatha Christie's Murder is Easy (1939). But was that the first? I haven't found any prior literature with this trope. Arguably homosexuality was "invented" in 1869, so it's unlikely the trope predates that. I have found a painting of a real gay antiques dealer, who is strongly visually coded as such, from 1926. "Roberto Montenegro’s iconic portrait of the antiques dealer Chucho Reyes (1926) features the limp wrist, the tilted chin, and the wry smile that signified a certain type of man." Anyone else have insight to share on this?

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Owls are Made of Knives

2023-10-02T01:35:49Z

I could have sworn I re-posted this at the time, but apparently not, I just emailed Kestrell a copy. So here, for general enjoyment, is the Seanan McGuire Twitter adventure we call "Owls are Made of Knives".

There is an owl in the trees outside my window, hooting like it has been personally dispatched to bring as the Good Word of Athena.
11:49 AM - 16 Feb 2016

The cats are going MOTHERFUCKING GONZO BALLISTIC with excitement. Ever see a 28-lb cat hit the window? SHIT SHAKES.
11:49 AM - 16 Feb 2016

Alice and Thomas just jumped for the window at the same time and collided in midair. This is some Cartoon Network bullshit.
11:52 AM - 16 Feb 2016

The owl is still going.
11:52 AM - 16 Feb 2016

Is this owl here to deliver my Hogwarts letter?
11:53 AM - 16 Feb 2016
82% Yes
18% No
391 votes . Final results

Alice is now snubbing the owl. She is LOUDLY SLEEPING, while Thomas howls in fury at the uncaring window.
11:56 AM - 16 Feb 2016

This is how feline supervillains are made. With an owl, and a window that won't conveniently open.
11:56 AM - 16 Feb 2016

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH OWL JUST HIT THE WINDOW
12:28 PM - 16 Feb 2016

WHY OWL WHY NO THOMAS NO DON'T HIT THE WINDOW BACK WHAT THE FUCK
12:29 PM - 16 Feb 2016

NATURE STOP
12:29 PM - 16 Feb 2016

Owl was brown, shaggy, not a barn owl, larger than I like an owl to be when near me, and totally fine.
12:53 PM - 16 Feb 2016

I do not have pictures of Owl, because Owl is JUST FINE, THANKS, and attempted to chase me out of the yard when I went outside.
1:10 PM - 16 Feb 2016

When I say "attempted," read "succeeded in doing so."
1:10 PM - 16 Feb 2016

Nothing says "aren't you lucky to live with me?" like an unexpected dead owl on top of the frozen peas.
1:11 PM - 16 Feb 2016

Owl was not dead. Owl is JUST FINE. Owl made an UNGODLY NOISE, mantled its wings, and ran at me. OWLS CAN RUN.
1:11 PM - 16 Feb 2016

OWLS CAN RUN LIKE HOLY FUCK NOBODY'S FUCKING BUSINESS GO OWL GO PLEASE GO PLEASE GO AWAY.
1:12 PM - 16 Feb 2016

Owl is still in the bushes outside my bedroom window, hooting occasionally. Smug fucker.
1:14 PM - 16 Feb 2016

If Owl does not recover and fly away in an hour or so, I'm going to call Wildlife Rescue.
1:14 PM - 16 Feb 2016

Owl owns my yard now.
1:14 PM - 16 Feb 2016

If I call Wildlife Rescue, I bet THEY'LL let me take a picture without trying to TAKE MY FACE.
1:15 PM - 16 Feb 2016

Pro tip: if you try to do this, an owl may eat your face. A large, angry, aggressive, dazed, teenage owl with talons like knives.
1:18 PM - 16 Feb 2016

Multiple people have now asked for pictures. Y'all, I have no pictures because Owl is BIG, ANGRY, FAST, and POINTY.
1:23 PM - 16 Feb 2016

I enjoy taking pictures of things that are not ACTIVELY TRYING TO MURDER THE SHIT OUT OF ME AND TAKE MY FACE.
1:24 PM - 16 Feb 2016

Owl is NOT ONE OF THOSE THINGS. Owl is blaming me for all of its woes. OWL IS MADE OF KNIVES.
1:24 PM - 16 Feb 2016

NO I AM NOT STAGING A POKEMON BATTLE BETWEEN THOMAS AND THE OWL HOLY SHIT YOU GUYS
NO.
1:29 PM - 16 Feb 2016

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH NO
1:36 PM - 16 Feb 2016

OWL NO DO NOT ATTACK THE WINDOW NO
1:36 PM - 16 Feb 2016

I now know what the scream of a frustrated Great Horned Owl sounds like from five feet away. In other news, Alice can levitate.
1:37 PM - 16 Feb 2016

Owl is screaming again, but not attacking the window. It is a different scream this time. I am going to investigate.
1:41 PM - 16 Feb 2016

If I am not back in five minutes, I have just had the best horror movie death I could reasonably expect in this reality.
1:41 PM - 16 Feb 2016

Update: Owl has killed the ever-loving shit out of a mockingbird.
This is the best day of my life.
TAKE THAT, YOU NOISY BASTARDS.
1:45 PM - 16 Feb 2016

Owl is still refusing to come into a position where I can take his picture through my window, but feathers occasionally drift by.
1:51 PM - 16 Feb 2016

There are three more mockingbirds living in those trees, Owl. PLEASE EAT THEM ALL I DO NOT WANT THEM.
1:51 PM - 16 Feb 2016

Hoo hoo, says Owl.
Hoo HOO hoo, says Owl.
FUCK THIS SHIT, I'M HIDING UNDER MOMMY, says my cat.
2:02 PM - 16 Feb 2016

The hooting has stopped. I am going outside again.
2:06 PM - 16 Feb 2016

OWL IS GONE REPEAT OWL IS GONE OWL HAS FLOWN THE FUCK BACK TO WHATEVER UNSPEAKABLE HELL IT WAS SPAWNED FROM
2:10 PM - 16 Feb 2016

GOODBYE OWL
HA HA HA HA YOU DIDN'T GET MY FACE
GOODBYYYYYYYYYYYYE OWL
2:11 PM - 16 Feb 2016

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Brotherhood of the Wolf

2023-09-19T02:06:10Z

Today, Kestrell and I finished watching an absolutely bonkers werewolf movie from 2001 called Brotherhood of the Wolf. It's in French, though a decent English dub is available.*

The story is based on a real historical event, the Beast of Gévaudan, where a wolf-like creature ravaged the French countryside for a few years in the 1760s. Many historic details are faithfully recreated in the film, though it veers into extremely fictional territory as well. It's historical romance, it's horror, it's action movie, it's mystery, it's political conspiracy thriller, it's Enlightenment versus Catholicism, it has all the tropes.

Our hero, Grégoire de Fronsac, a soldier by profession but a naturalist by vocation, has been sent by the king, not to catch the Beast, but to taxidermy its corpse (once caught) for return to the court. But Fronsac has his own ideas about what he should be doing. His independence is evidenced by the presence of his right-hand man and blood-brother, Mani, the last survivor of an Iroquois tribe. Mani is pretty awesome, but he is undeniably a Magic Indian, with all the baggage that entails.

Fronsac has relationships with both a Good Girl and a Bad Girl. The Good Girl's brother is our token disabled character, and somewhat of an antagonist for much of the film. There are more tropes throughout, but I don't need to list them exhaustively (and several are major spoilers).

The horror scenes are pretty effective, and the action scenes largely well choreographed. I only cavil because the final fight in the film *seriously* broke my suspension of disbelief. I can accept a hero handily defeating dozens of minions while shrugging off near-fatal wounds, that just goes with the territory. But that final fight almost edges into anime territory for sheer over-the-top gratuitous weapon-fu.

The film's pacing was... odd. Along with all the different genres, there was some unusual storytelling choices. Several times during the film, a major piece of the mystery plot gets off-handedly revealed to the audience in a scene that none of the protagonists are privy to. One of which is the question common to a notable minority of werewolf movies, "Is there really a werewolf here at all, or is there a more mundane explanation?" I won't answer that for you, but I will say that the answer was complex and surprising.

While set in the 1760s, the story is embedded in a frame set during the French Revolution. This has more significance to the plot than is at first apparent. One of the historical details the film adopts is that the king's failure to remove the threat of the Beast damaged the king's political standing. In an age where The Divine Right of Kings is starting to be questioned, but still official dogma, werewolves can be a surprisingly political issue.

Content warnings: Lots of gore and violence, including violence to and by animals. One distressing (though brief) rape scene. Death of some protagonists. A fair amount of R-rated-level nudity, of both men and women (though for most of my readers, I expect that's a plus). Racism (albeit frowned on by the script). Misogyny in the typically casual French way. Mocking of organized religion.

[It occurs to me, as I compose that list, that this story could be an Assassin's Creed videogame with relatively few changes. Right down to, "The final confrontation is ludicrously implausible."]

Not a great movie, but solidly entertaining. Recommended, with caveats.

* I also had the subtitles on and, as is often the case with foreign films, the subtitles and dubbing didn't always agree on how to translate. Usually in minor ways, but I was struck by a pronoun issue. The dub referes to the Beast as "it", whereas the subtitles use "she". The Beast's gender doesn't much matter to the plot, but I felt it gave a very different flavor to the story.

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The Dipshit Paradox

2023-07-27T04:03:00Z

A good essay juliusgoat, which seems related to my own recent post about Censorship and the Nazi bar.

The Dipshit Paradox
Profoundly ignorant? Deliberately malicious and lying? Does it matter? The demand to engage in good faith with supremacists in a musky age.

https://armoxon.substack.com/p/the-dipshit-paradox

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Good Omens (TV version) and Modernity

2023-07-26T21:09:18Z

Kestrell and I were having a conversation about the use of language in Good Omens. She noted that Crowley (and *all* the demons) had "lower-class" accents, while Aziraphale (and many angels) spoke in Received Pronunciation. We talked about how this reflected the British class structure for a while, but I poked at some interesting holes in this model. The angel Sandalphon is *not* upper-crust; he speaks (and acts) like a thug. And Gabriel, of course, speaks (and dresses) like an American businessman. Heaven isn't marked as upper *class*; they're marked as *rich*, almost capitalist.

Then it hit me that there's a very interesting contrast going on. The story makes it clear from the beginning that one of the things that distinguishes Crowley from other demons is that Crowley understands modernity in a way that the other demons simply don't. Aziraphale is the perfect reflection of that. Aziraphale understands the values of *tradition* in a way that the other angels have clearly forgotten, while they have embraced modernity. It seems like most of Heaven took management courses during the twentieth century, and adopted the lamentable "win at any cost" attitude. (As Kestrell put it, "They're Sloanies.")

Not sure whether or not that was consciously intended, but I think it's neat.

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Censorship and the Nazi bar

2023-07-18T19:14:57Z

I recently read an interesting book: What's Our Problem?, by Tim Urban. His basic thesis (grossly oversimplified) is that modern society has become too tribal, and would benefit from becoming more analytical. This is a thesis I agree with, but I found our points of disagreement interesting.

Urban is basically a left-leaning person, addressing a presumed left-leaning audience, so he finds it easy to demonstrate this dogmatic attitude happening on the American right. He spends a much larger amount of the book demonstrating similar behavior on the American left, which makes sense. His presumed audience is going to be much harder to convince of problems with the right than of similar problems with the left. Being on the left myself, I had some strong negative emotional reactions to these chapters. But, in the spirit of the book, I examined those reactions carefully to see if they were *just* emotional, or whether I had any substantive issues.

Urban presents many esamples of what he refers to as "Social Justice Fundamentalism", which can be summed up as regarding certain speech acts as completely taboo, to the extent that people's careers have been ruined by uttering such speech, and this has exerted a significant chilling effect on rational debate. This is the "cancel culture" that many complain about, and I reluctantly cede that it is a real phenomenon.

But I noticed a pattern in all the many, many examples that Urban provided. None of these taboo ideas were *new* ideas. They had all been quite solidly discredited by rational debate already. Most of them were simply factually false. There were some where it was possible to argue a kernel of truth. But the one thing these ideas all had in common was Nazi bars.( Read more... )

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Alexx's Patreon Update: June, 2023

2023-06-13T17:49:01Z

Annotated chapters 13 and 14 of Jerusalem. Further details below:( Read more... )

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Dream Fragment with Greer

2023-05-20T02:09:32Z

Outside a Buttery Party at night, probably a New Years, judging by the snow. nineweaving wanders out, rather merry. Seeing a lamp post sparks a memory of a joke, or perhaps a vow, decades gone. She throws her arms around the post, exclaiming, "I never knocked you down! I'm so sorry!"

[This made sense in context, but I didn't manage to retain any more of the context through to waking. But I hope it amuses, nonetheless.]

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Dragaera Timeline updated for Tsalmoth

2023-05-19T21:48:46Z

The Dragaeran Timeline has now been updated with information from the latest book, Tsalmoth. Of particular note is a short essay which (I hope) lays out what everyone was actually doing, in a clearer fashion than Vlad ever does in his narration.

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The Artifice Girl (2022)

2023-05-14T20:12:48Z

Anyone who has the slightest interest in science fiction stories about AIs needs to see this film. Seriously.

Trigger warnings: Discussion of child sexual abuse and emotional abuse; one short but distressing fistfight.

The setup is that a brilliant young man has created an artificial girl as a honeypot to catch pedophiles. She started out as a modified chatbot, but after he worked on her for a while, started to upgrade herself into what might be considered an AI. ( Read more... )

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Bagpipes theory

2023-02-19T04:08:17Z

The other day, I ran across the myth of Marsyas, who foolishly challenged Apollo to a music contest. As generally happens, he lost. Apollo skinned him, and, in some versions of the tale, made a wineskin out of Marsyas's hide. Another version says that Marsyas's skin is hung up in a cave, and moves if you play Phrygian music near it. Marsyas was a Phrygian, and some sources suggest that the myth reflects a cultural struggle between Phrygian and Greek musical styles.

I'm writing this post because of a connection I made while Googling about this myth. Could this bag of skin that responds to music and is associated with pipes be... a bagpipe? Apparently, the ancient Hittites may have had bagpipes, so it's not completely out of the question. Could Greek culture have so trounced the acceptibility of the bagpipe that only this echo of an echo of a myth reflects its existence? It's thin evidence, but I think it's a good story :-)

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Staircases and Sharks

2023-02-05T06:34:03Z

The Single-Staircase Radicals Have a Good Point

This article pissed me off, for somewhat complex reasons. I agree with many of the goals expressed here. It would be good for staircases to not be brutalist concrete. It would be good for apartments to have more varied floor plans, and to let in more light. It is even good to examine past assumptions that have been baked into regulation and law, and see if they still make sense. But to abandon such a fundamental safety mechanism as a second staircase? This is, to me, madness. ( Read more... )

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Swamp Thing meets disability

2023-01-09T18:06:36Z

So, I knew about Amy Mullins having prosthetic "cheetah" legs, designed to be incredibly fast. And I knew that she had some ornamental "glass" legs. But I only today learned that she has a pair of legs primarily made of *soil*, with potatoes and beets growing in them!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JQ0iMulicgg&ab_channel=TED

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Uncle Sven archive

2022-11-24T19:58:35Z

Ursula Vernon is one of my favorite authors, and also a great Twitterer. She has a fondness for getting into arguments with trolls. When she gets bored of such an argument, she sometimes ends it by going off into stories about her (presumed mythical) Great Uncle Sven. Since Twitter could vanish at any moment, I have taken the precaution of archiving the Uncle Sven stories I am aware of. Enjoy!( Read more... )

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1899 review

2022-11-23T08:11:10Z

Netflix's recommendations pushed this series at me, probably because I watched all 3 seasons of Dark, an earlier show by the same creators. That was an extremely twisty time-travel epic that mostly held together and made sense, no mean feat. It was, as you might guess from the title, quite grim and not for everyone, but I liked it a lot. So Kes and I checked out 1899 together. (Very minor spoilers.)

Early impressions were: "Lost on a period steamship." This was not promising, as I loathe Abrams-style mystery boxes. But the goodwill from Dark left me confident that this was not such a box. And at any rate, the characters and setting were interesting, and the weird elements were tantalizing, so it held our interest.

( Read more... )

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Remembering Kirk

2022-11-21T21:29:05Z

This article was written several years ago, but remains relevant. It's about Star Trek, but it's more about the process(es) of cultural memory.
http://strangehorizons.com/non-fiction/columns/freshly-rememberd-kirk-drift/

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Lovecraft thought

2022-11-10T18:52:31Z

I've recently been re-reading a bunch of Lovecraft for an online course Kestrell and I are taking. "The Call of Cthulhu" still has one of the best first paragraphs I've ever read.

But the second paragraph, on this read, pulled me out of the story entirely. To paraphrase: "I hope no one else ever puts together these disparate facts. So here's a neatly organized document linking them together." And again, at the end, the final sentence (and here I quote): "Let me pray that, if I do not survive this manuscript, my executors may put caution before audacity and see that it meets no other eye." Um, dude. Why don't you just burn it yourself? For that matter, why did you write it in the first place?

Recalling, however, my maxim that fixfics are more fun than nitpicks, I began to consider if there was a reason why the narrator doesn't destroy the manuscript. And I think my solution is pretty interesting.

"Call" makes it abundantly clear that sensitive minds can have their dreams affected by Cthulhu. What if their waking minds can also be affected to some degree? Possibly the various eldritch beings want to be documented, and influence people to do so.

We know that some of the strange things that HP writes about are not entirely physical. In "The Dunwich Horror", the titular being is described thus: "Only the least fraction was really matter in any sense we know." The naïve interpretation is that Lovecraft is talking about higher mathematical dimensions, or parallel universes in the now-standard SF sense. But what if these beings, either partially or fully, inhabit something akin to Alan Moore's notion of Ideaspace?

For those unfamiliar, here's Moore describing Ideaspace: "The idea of adapting a spatial metaphor for the properties of the mind and consciousness grew naturally out of the almost entirely spatial metaphors that we use already when referring to consciousness: we speak of things being on our minds, at the forefront or shoved to the back of our minds; we talk of being in or out of our right minds, even though our cranium is entirely filled with a kind of pinkish-grey electrified custard in which there is no physical space to be on, in, out of or at the front and back of. When we speak of higher consciousness, just how many feet above sea level is that? The idea of conscious awareness occupying some sort of space seems entirely natural to us, so I attempted to hypothesise about the possible nature of this hypothetical "space", which I labelled Ideaspace. One thing that struck me is that such a space might conceivably be a mutual space, even though we each apparently possess our own discrete consciousness. Maybe our individual and private consciousness is, in Ideaspace terms, the equivalent of owning an individual and private house, an address, in material space? The space inside our homes is entirely ours, and yet if we step out through the front door we find ourselves in a street, a world, that is mutually accessible and open to anyone. […] A further notion that came to me was that this hypothetical Ideaspace, where philosophies are land masses and religions are probably whole countries, might contain flora and fauna that are native to it, creatures of this conceptual world that are made from ideas in the same way that we creatures of the material world are made from matter. This could conceivably explain phantoms, angels, demons, gods, djinns, grey aliens, elves, pixies, smurfs and any of the other evidently non-material entities that people claim to have encountered over the centuries."

If beings like Yog-Sothoth, Cthulhu, and the rest exist wholly or partially in this Ideaspace, then the act of writing about them is a method for them to reproduce. These beings could be seen as mimetic viruses, using hapless Lovecraft narrators as hosts. And on some level, these hosts appear to realize what is happening and fight against it, though ultimately unsuccessfully. (If there are successes, we wouldn't know of them, for obvious reasons.)

And as I continued to re-read HPL stories, I saw this pattern again and again. "At the Mountains of Madness" purports to want to discourage scientific expeditions to the Antarctic, while laying out details that could not fail to excite the interest of scientists worldwide. The narrator of "The Shadow Over Innsmouth" writes: "I am going to defy the ban on speech about this thing [...] I have an odd craving to whisper about those few frightful hours". In "The Whisperer in Darkness", Henry Akeley shares information with the narrator, but insists, in italics, "This is private." Akeley encourages the narrator to back away at several points in the story, but ineffectually. Later "Akeley" (actually an imposter) writes "The alien beings desire to know mankind more fully, and to have a few of mankind’s philosophic and scientific leaders know more about them." (italics added). Throughout the HPL canon, The Necronomicon is described as "forbidden", yet there are copies in every collection of occult books, and most of the narrators have perused them.

I think this is a neat lens to read Lovecraft through. Though of course, you should by no means read any Lovecraft! Turn off your computer before it is too late!

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Wisdom about advocacy

2022-10-23T04:40:32Z

Two posts from a wise friend of mine, who has been helping shape public policy for decades:
Feld's Laws of Advocacy
A Reflection on the Nature of Effective Advocacy

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