alexxkay: (Default)
Alexx Kay ([personal profile] alexxkay) wrote2008-04-16 11:46 am

War of the Sexes: Tribal Play?

A while back, [livejournal.com profile] cvirtue mentioned that her twins had suddenly started doing the "boys are icky!" "No, *girls* are icky!" thing, and wondered how it had gotten started. It occurred to me that there might be an EvBio answer. In discussion on her LJ, it was claimed that this is just a stage that almost all children go through.

I've long thought that tribalism was pretty firmly hard-wired into primate minds. It's a fairly complex and subtle set of behaviors and attitudes. So how do animals learn complex skills like this?

One way is through instinctive play. Young cats will 'fight' in a way which doesn't do serious harm to either party, but does teach skills that will be useful in real-world combats to come. I think that "the gender war" may serve a similar purpose with regards to tribalism. Tribalism requires identifying an "other". Someone of the opposite gender obviously qualifies, and is easily identified. Boys don't *really* want to "kill all the girls", but *pretending* they do is useful practice for later tribal conflicts (and bonding within the tribe).

Mind you, I'm not sure that tribalism, as currently evolved, is the best survival strategy in our current environment. I'm not sure it *isn't*, but there seem to be large wins available by at least greatly expanding the size of one's "tribe" (see "nationalism", "patriotism", "politics", etc.).

[identity profile] elusiveat.livejournal.com 2008-04-16 04:43 pm (UTC)(link)
You may or may not be aware of the even more ancient evolutionary conflicts between the sexes. What is best evolutionarily for one sex is not always the best evolutionarily for the other.

Also, an interesting anthropological example can be found in the book _Women of the Forest_. It's a South American culture that's patrilinial but matrilocal. The anthropologists realized that by asking questions to the men, they got a distorted view of the culture, and that the women and men almost have two distinct cultures and mythologies that are somewhat at odds with each other.

Interesting stuff, though not particularly pleasant. Lots of misogyny in the male culture.
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[identity profile] alexx-kay.livejournal.com 2008-04-16 05:04 pm (UTC)(link)
What is best evolutionarily for one sex is not always the best evolutionarily for the other.

I'm aware of that, but I wouldn't expect it to be a major cause of behavior patterns that happen so long before puberty. Especially since the patterns I'm talking about typically *stop* at puberty, once actual reproduction starts being feasible.

patrilinial but matrilocal

OK, matrilocal (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Matrilocality) is my new word learned for today. Thanks! Interesting idea, especially when seen in such a counter-intuitive context.

the women and men almost have two distinct cultures and mythologies that are somewhat at odds with each other.

Wasn't aware of that example, but I was aware that there were cultures where male and female effectively *are* two distinct tribes. As far as I can tell, they represent a distinct minority. One might argue that they are cases where gender/tribal-play went pathological. (I know that that word is judgmental, but all the examples I've seen are 'primitive' cultures on the verge of extinction, so I think it's fair to at least suspect that they are 'unfit'.)

Pathology

[identity profile] metageek.livejournal.com 2008-04-16 08:55 pm (UTC)(link)
There probably are some simple pragmatic reasons to think of such cultures as unfit. Right off the bat: skills and knowledge have a hard time spreading across gender lines. Imagine the myths that grow up when the only way a man ever hears about menstruation is from other men.
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[identity profile] alexx-kay.livejournal.com 2008-04-16 05:09 pm (UTC)(link)
By the by, have we met outside of LJ? I see that we share many Friends in common, but I don't actually know who you are.

(Anonymous) 2008-04-16 08:42 pm (UTC)(link)
I hold Reading Night. Formerly at the Buttery. ; )

[identity profile] elusiveat.livejournal.com 2008-04-16 08:45 pm (UTC)(link)
Er, that was me. Guh.
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[identity profile] alexx-kay.livejournal.com 2008-04-16 09:50 pm (UTC)(link)
Light dawns!

[identity profile] cvirtue.livejournal.com 2008-04-16 07:58 pm (UTC)(link)
Interesting idea.

On the other hand, if I had both boys or both girls, they'd choose something other than sex to be divisive about.
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[identity profile] alexx-kay.livejournal.com 2008-04-16 08:23 pm (UTC)(link)
While I'll grant that all siblings tend to find things to conflict over, I think that the gender-war thing is probably distinct in kind from that. Do you think if you had two boys that they *wouldn't* go through a "girls are icky!" phase?

[identity profile] cvirtue.livejournal.com 2008-04-16 08:31 pm (UTC)(link)
I think they'd go through it later, when gender differences/behaviors are more pronounced.

Several of my f-list have single-sex gaggles of children; I'll ask.